Selfishness

When you have children and they become the priority because you are their provider, are you still allowed to want things for yourself? Or is this considered to be selfish?

I have 3 boys...ages 15, 12, and 10...and they are not cheap boys! Between all of their sports gear, school needs, clothing and shoe requests, entertainment, food, etc, etc...I often feel guilty if I want something or spend money on myself.

My situation is a little out of the ordinary because I am remarried and my Husband is not the father of my kids; he spends "HIS" money above and beyond what I spend of "MY" money on my kids. But because of this, I feel guilty if I expect anything from him for myself...for instance, I've been married for over 6 months and don't have an engagement/wedding ring, I didn't receive a Christmas gift, am not expecting anything for Valentine's, and can't plan any kind of getaway (A.K.A. honeymoon), even though I'm in desperate need of some time away.

But here is my real dilemma, I feel guilty for wanting those things but also am upset because I haven't gotten those things?! Here is where the selfishness lies. I feel like a total cad; I know he spent a ton of money on my kids for Christmas, for their Birthdays, and on other everyday needs...but I like presents too! He bought me presents and took me places when we were dating but that has come to a complete halt...should I have known that this would happen?

This is one of those blogs that I hope he misses when he's checking out the latest because I've never even said anything to him about this because as I said I feel like a complete cad.

So, help me out...am I being selfish?